Snotty and Snottier/Transcript

Here's 16th episode for season 2 from Winnie the Pooh Goes Back at the Barnyard. Here's the Transcript.

The Beginning

(The scene begins with everyone running from Snotty Boy)

• Snotty Boy: You can run but you can't hide from the awesome power of my earwax blaster.
• Donald Duck: Where did he even get all the wax from?
• Luan: Easy, a wax museum. (laughs) Get it? (sprayed with wax)

(Soon Snotty went after everybody. Otis took some wax to save Abby)

• Snotty Boy: Say your prayers, milky boy.
• Winnie the Pooh: I don't suppose you would be satisfied with a hug...instead.
• Snotty Boy: I'll show you a hug, stupid bear.
• Tigger: He's got Otis!
• Rabbit: And Pooh too!
• Mrs. Beady: Eugene!
• Snotty Boy: I'M BUSY!!!!!
• Mrs. Beady: Come home! I have a wonderful surprise for you!
• Snotty Boy: A surprise? I like surprises. You two are lucky.
• Mrs. Beady: EUGENE!!!!!
• Snotty Boy: I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME!!!!! (leaves)

(Everyone comes out in pain)

• Tigger: Shooting at us with ear wax. How nasty can you get?
• Otis: Alright. Is everyone ok?
• Peck: Sorry I can't hear you. I have wax in my ears. AND IT'S NOT MINE!!!!
• Lola: That wax ruined my dress!
• Human Rarity: So did mine!
• Pip: I hate that kid.
• Abby: He's inhuman.
• Freddy: He's not of this earth!
• Spike the dog: He's a animal torturer.
• Donald: He's insane!
• Pig: He's a monster.
• Peck: What?
• Otis: I don't like the sound of this big surprise.
• Freddy: I don't like the sound of vacuums.
• Pip: You not bright.
• Otis: Let's follow him.

(At Mrs. Beady's House)

• Mrs. Beady: OHH!!!! There's my smooth skin little man cub!
• Snotty: Gah, what-ev-er. Where my stupid surprise?

(A boy with braces and wearing military clothes comes slowly from the kitchen)

• ???: Hello cousin.

(Snotty Boy screamed)

• ???: It's been a long time.

(Snotty Boy screamed again)

• Mrs. Beady: Oh, I knew you be thrilled. Bernard stopped by on his way to Explosives Camp.
• Bernard: Yeah. Family means everything to me. Auntie Nora, would you go get us one of your delicious big boy snacks?
• Mrs. Beady: Good idea, Bernard. You two have a lot of catching up to do. (leaves to the kitchen)
• Bernard: Well, well.
• Snotty Boy: Ok, look Bernard. You may have beaten me up when I was little, but I don't know if you notice, I'm not little anymore.
• Bernard: I totally understand what you're coming from. (drops a clock on Snotty) That's why, all I want is you to say that you're a dirty Pilgrim.
• Snotty Boy: I'm not gonna say that.
• Bernard: Really? (literally took Snotty's nose) Got your nose! Here you can have it back now. (puts it back) Now, will you admit that your a dirty Pilgrim.
• Snotty Boy: No, I will not admit it!

(Bernard started beating Snotty Boy and as the smoke clear, Snotty was on the ceiling fan)

• Mrs. Beady: Eugene, just look as the mess you made.
• Bernard: I try to tell him Auntie Nora. He just a dirty Pilgrim.

(Snotty Boy falls down, follow by the ceiling fan, a bathtub, and a ostrich)

• Human Fluttershy: That kid was so mean to Snotty Boy.
• Otis: I know. I think I love him.

(Everyone agrees)

• Peck: What?
• Pip: Too bad that cousin kid can't stay until Snotty leaves.
• Otis: Maybe he can.

(In the kitchen, the telephone rings)

• Mrs. Beady: I'll get that.
• Snotty Boy: I am soooo gonna tell Auntie on you. (smack with the table) Or not.
• Mrs. Beady: Hello?
• Otis: Yes, this is Counselor Gint Mcsplooedy from Explosives Camp
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, hello, counselor.
• Otis: Sorry, to tell you that the camp has gone out of business. So Bernard have to make other plans this month. (Freddy makes a exploding sound) Whoops. That was big explosion in Cabin 9. Gotta go!
• Mrs. Beady: Ok, bye. (back to the kitchen) The man from your camp says it's gone out of business.
• Bernard: WHAT!?!? (sprayed juice in Snotty's eyes) That's not fair to me!
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, you poor thing. I know. How would like to stay here and play with your cousin all summer?
• Bernard: Well that sounds delightful. I'll go unpack.
• Snotty Boy: Auntie Nora, Bernard can't stay here. He likes a firm mattress and yours are all extra firm.
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, you just don't wanna share your Auntie Nora, no you don't. Well don't worry. You're always gonna be my favorite. Now where did I put all those guest towels. (leaves)
• Bernard: (comes in) Come on cousin. Time to play.

(Snotty runs away as Bernard walks after him)

The Middle

(Snotty kept running and trips over a rock to the barnyard)

• Bernard: You can run, but not well!
• Otis: This is great. This the best idea I ever had.
• Tigger: You should teach that kid and thing or three
• Timmy Turner: And best of all, with Bernard around, no more getting beat up, right?
• Donald Duck: Yeah.
• Bernard: (senses something) Wait a minute. I sense joy and innocence waiting to be crushed. (turns to the others)
• Otis: Uh, guys, we might want to get inside and hide our entrails.
• Lisa: Peace out. I'll be in my bunker. (dashes off)
• Lincoln: Everyone else to the barnyard! We'll be safe there.

(Everybody rushes into the barnyard and barricade the door.)

• Human Pinkie Pie: Are you sure that'll hold him?
• Otis: Of course, as long he doesn't have any explosi--(the doors bursts)
• Eeyore: To make a long story short, uh oh.
• Bernard: Let's party.
• Tigger: Show him what you're made of, Buddy Bear.
• Winnie the Pooh: Fluff?
• Tigger: I think we're in big trouble.

(Bernard started beating everyone up and causing havoc)

• Bernard: Bye, silly billy barn animals and silly dumb kids. (snickers) See you all summer!
• Pig: (Head on Otis' body) Is he gone?
• Otis: (head on Pig's body) He's gone. I not even sure how he did this.
• Pig: That is one sick kid.
• Peck: (beak on backwards) I think he had a good time.
• Freddy: (In a wall) Yes. I think he really felt at home.
• Abby: (in a haystack) Has anyone seen Pip?
• Pip: (Coming out of her nose) I think you have a sinus infection.
• Otis: Is everyone else ok?
• Human Rainbow Dash: That jerk broke and slammed my head into my guitar.
• Mickey Mouse: He almost broke my ears.
• Sunset Shimmer: I don't think i can sit ever again after what he did.
• Donald Duck: Why that little--
• Tigger: Donald, watch your words.
• Human Applejack: He lassoed me to the ceiling.
• Timmy Turner: That's nothing compared to he did to Cosmo and Wanda.
• Cosmo: I can't believe he had hail as the size of a minivan.
• Wanda: (one falls on her) Fully loaded mini vans.
• Lincoln: That's it! That kid crossed the line this time.
• Luna: (painted blue) I say that line was crossed when this happened, bra.
• Lana: (covered in soot and smoke) Or this.
• Luan: (with a cast on her leg) Or this.
• Lily: (radioactive) Ga-ga.
• Scruffy: Whatever the case is. We're in bigger trouble than we are before
• Rabbit: No wonder Snotty is terrified of Bernard. He's insane!
• Otis: I can't believe I'm saying this. But we were better off when Snotty Boy was our enemy.
• Pig: Otis what are we going to do? That psycho kid's gonna be here all summer.
• Human Fluttershy: Maybe we should tell Mrs. Beady about Bernard.
• Goofy: She's not going to believe us.
• Piglet: The only way she'll believe us is if she sees Bernard hurting Snotty Boy.
• Otis: Piglet, that's it!
• Human Applejack: What's it?
• Otis: Guys do you remember what Mrs. Beady said to Snotty Boy this morning?

(They think about it, but they couldn't remember)

• Pip: Do you have a thought bubble to remind us?
• Otis: I do actually.
• Mrs. Beady: (in a thought bubble) You'll always be my favorite. Favorite, favorite...
• Otis: (pops the bubble) Come on guys. I have a plan.

(Later in the forest, Snotty Boy muttering scared when he hears something)

• Snotty Boy: Who is it? Is that you B-Bernard?
• Otis: (comes in misty fog in Indian clothing) We're not going to hurt you.
• Snotty Boy: Who are you?
• Otis: I am Walks With Udders, your animal spirit guide. And these are some of my spirit guide friends. Officer Pig.
• Pig: Top of the morning.
• Otis: Two Construction workers.
• Freddy: Hey, how'd ya doing?
• Peck: Forget about it.
• Otis: A sailor of some type.
• Abby: Ahoy there.
• Otis: Some heroes we don't know and also don't care.
• Lynn:Yeah. Hey!
• Human Pinkie Pie: I didn't know you were a physic, Lucy.
• Lucy: It's Madame Lucy.
• Otis: And this tiny lounge singer.

[Pip]

I'm just crazy about chestnuts.

Cause chestnuts got that zing.

• Snotty Boy: What's that sound?
• Otis: What sound?
• Snotty Boy: How come every time I hear that sound there's like fog coming out of your dress
• Otis: This isn't a dress
• Snotty Boy: Looks like a dress to me
• Otis: I assure you it's not a--
• Snotty Boy: Do you have, like, a fogger under there. You have a fogger.
• Otis: What?

(Snotty and Otis kept arguing)

• Otis: Yes, never mind that. We have heard your cries against your enemy and come to lend you our spirit power
• Snotty Boy: You don't look that powerful to me.
• Rabbit: Mickey, if you please.

(Mickey bonks him on the head)

• Otis: If you want to defeat your enemy, follow us to the Place of Reckoning.
• Snotty Boy: The place of what?
• Sci-Twi: Just follow us. (Late that night at the Barnyard)
• Otis: Welcome to the Place of Reckoning!
• Snotty Boy: This is looks like a stupid barn. Are you going to help bear Bernard of what?
• Human Rainbow Dash: (whispering) Not with that attitude he's not.
• Otis: Fellow spirits, anoint him with the chaste of power.
• Abby: The Snowglobe of Strength.
• Peck: The Rotting Stick of Agility.
• Freddy: This Ketchup Packet of Dexterity.
• Pig: And a garlic crouton.
• Snotty Boy: What's this do?
• Pig: Nothing. But it's excellent in salads. Really perks up a bowl of soup.
• Otis: (shushes Pig) With these tools, you shall conquer Bernard.
• Human Fluttershy: (whispering) You sure this is going to work?
• Snotty Boy: Muscles growing. Courage issuing forth from every pore. I...AM...CONQUERING BOY!!!!
• Eeyore: Nope.

The Ending

• Narrator: The Next Day.

(Bernard pulling a cat's tail when he heard the phone ring)

• Bernard: What?
• Snotty Boy: Oh, sorry. I must have the wrong number. You're clearly a troll.
• Bernard: Eugene?
• Snotty Boy: Oh Hi, Bernard. Gosh, you really sound like a stupid troll on the phone. A troll with a wire on his head. (Bernard turns red and steam comes out of his nose) I hear your face throbbing, dear head.
• Bernard: Tell me where your face is so I can destroy it.
• Snotty Boy: Meet me at the Place of Reckoning. It's a large red building 100 yards down the road.
• Bearnard: You mean that barn?
• Snotty Boy: PLACE OF RECKONING!!!! (hangs up) Now, to summon more power. (rubs the crouton all over his body)
• Pip: Otis, are you sure about this? Bernard gonna turn him into a Snotty Burger.
• Otis: Nah, I will be back with Mrs. Beady before it gets serious. When she sees Bernard beating on her precious Snotty Boy, she'll pack him up forever and it bye-bye psycho.
• Sunset Shimmer: It's totally full proof.
• Winnie the Pooh: So how long do we have until Bernard arrives?
• Lisa: Based on speed, anger and his hatred of Snotty Boy, he'll be here in about 5 minutes.

(Bernard comes through the doors)

• Pig: Uh he's here.
• Otis: Milk me. (he runs off)
• Lisa: Milk me's right. I forget about pulverization. (Otis rides off on the scooter)
• Bernard: Time to stop your existence.
• Snotty Boy: Well, you probably don't know, that my stupid spirit guides gave me this Snowglobe of Strength, this Rotting Stick of Agility, and this Ketchup Packet of Dexterity.
• Bernard: What's the crouton for?
• Snotty Boy: It's very nice with salads. You can put it on---
• Bernard: Say goodbye to your body! (pulverizes Snotty Boy)
• Pig: He'll destroy him before Otis gets back.
• Wanda: Really hopes he comes back.
• Pip: Yeah, it's too bad. Who wants nachos?
• Cosmo: Ooh, I do.

(Everyone grabs some nachos)

• Otis: I am a talking cow.
• Mrs. Beady: You!
• Otis: Here! (gives her the key) You can chase me on the scooter.

(Mrs.Beady grabs her camera and chased after Otis)

(Back at the Barnyard)

• Bernard: I called this move the Snot Knot. (tied Snotty up with his arms and legs)

(Otis runs through a wall)

• Mrs. Beady: Smile, cow!
• Lori: Hey, Beady. Bernard is hurting your nephew!
• Snotty Boy: Auntie Nora, save me!
• Mrs. Beady: Bernard!
• Otis: Yoink! (takes the camera)
• Mrs. Beady: Take your hands off my little yum-yum man! (throws a horseshoe and makes a --- lands on Bernard) I'm sending you to your mother and father and you're never coming back. EVER!!!!!! (pulls his ear)
• Bernard: I'll be back, Eugene! And I'm gonna eat your silly billy skull!
• Snotty Boy: I did it! I defeated Bernard! And you know who I have to thank...

(Everyone is flattered until)

• Snotty: Me!
• Tigger: (mutters gibberish and gasps) WHAT!?!?
• Piglet: WHAT!!?!?
• Winnie the Pooh: WHAT!?!?!
• Rabbit: WHAT!?!?!?
• Eeyore: HUH!?!??!
• Timmy Turner: WHAT?!?!
• Cosmo and Wanda: WHAT?!?!
• Lincoln: WHAT?!?!
• Girl Louds: WHAT!?!?!
• Human Pinkie Pie: WHAT!!?!?
• Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and Goofy: What?!?!
• Rabbit: Why should you get the credit?
• Snotty Boy: Because I Rock-a La Casbah. And you're the worst spirit guides ever!
• Human Rainbow Dash: Oh yeah, what are you gonna do about it?
• Snotty Boy: I'm gonna kick you stupid spirit guide butts! (shot wax at Otis)
• Wanda: I hate that family.
• Donald: So what do we do now?
• Piglet: I guess, same thing what we always do.
• Snotty Boy: Where's your spirit fogger now, huh?

THE END!