Editing Ash's Adventures of Kung Fu Panda/Transcript

Here is the transcript of [[Ash's Adventures of Kung Fu Panda]].
==Opening/Meet Po the Panda==
* '''The Announcer:''' ''And now it's for Patchy's Pick, hosted by the great adventure host of all time, Patchy the Pirate.''
* '''Patchy the Pirate:''' Ahoy, fellow fanatics! Welcome to Patchy's Pick. Why don't come on back to the galley, I got a little treat for you today. We're gonna see me favorite Ash's Adventure film, "Kung Fu Panda" Ta-da!
* '''Potty:''' Boring!
* '''Patchy the Pirate:''' Well, If it isn't my less-than-amusing sidekick, Potty the Parrot. Potty, say hello to the nice people.
* '''Potty:''' Bawk! I'm being held here against my will-- Help!
* '''Patchy the Pirate: '''Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh... Oh, Potty come back! Potty? Potty? Where'd you go? Potty, you in here, buddy?
(Then the screen reveals that Patchy is in a cannon that is pointing outside the window)
* '''Potty:''' [laughs and squawking] Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha.
* '''Patchy the Pirate:''' Get me out of here, you scurvy bird! [The cannon blasts Patchy out and Patchy screams; he lands in a neighboring house which sinks like a boat. Patchy returns, still smoking from the cannon blast] Well, roll the film.

*'''Po''': ''[narrating]'' Legend tells of a legendary warrior whose Kung Fu skills were the stuff of legend. He travelled the land in search of worthy foes.

*''[The Dragon Warrior enters the shop filled with ferocious animal-like thugs. Several of them were holding bunny villagers hostage. The Dragon Warrior sits down and eats his meal.]''

*'''Gang Boss''': I see you like to chew. Maybe you should chew on my fist! ''[pounds the table]''

*'''Po''': ''[narrating]'' The warrior said nothing for his mouth was full. ''[The Dragon Warrior raises his hand.]'' Then he swallowed. ''[The Dragon Warrior swallowed his meal.]'' And then he spoke.

*'''Dragon Warrior''': Enough talk. Let's fight! '''SHA-SHA-BOOEY!'''

*''[The Dragon Warrior delivers a series of punches and kicks and the whole gang goes flying in various directions.]''

*'''Po''': ''[narrating]'' He was so deadly in fact that his enemies would go blind from overexposure to pure awesomeness!

*'''Ninja Cat''': My eyes!

*'''Gator Bandit''': He's too awesome!

*'''Female Bunny''': And attractive.

*'''Male Bunny''': How can we repay you?

*'''Dragon Warrior''': There is no charge for awesomeness... or attractiveness. ''[One hundred assassins appear and surround the warrior. The entire bar swells, packed to the rafters with ninjas.]'' '''KABLOOEY!''' ''[The roof explodes and the warrior with a cloud of ninjas erupts into the sky. Like a tornado, the warrior twists and kicks them away rapidly.]''

*'''Po''': ''[narrating]'' It mattered not how many foes he faced. They were no match for his bodacity.

*''[Two groups of thousands of foes leap at the warrior while in the air, but with a single flashy move he sends them flying. The beaten warriors plummet into the lake like rain as the warrior treks back across the bridge.]''

*'''Po''': ''[narrating]'' Never before had a panda been so feared... and so loved. ''[He looks up towards the Jade Palace, where a group of five warriors stand in various poses.]'' Even the most heroic heroes in all of China, the Furious Five, bowed in respect to this great master.

*''[The Five leap down from the palace, land in front of the warrior, and bow respectfully, before flanking in positions on both sides of him.]''

*'''Monkey''': We should hang out.

*'''Dragon Warrior''': Agreed.

*''[The Five strike an attack pose, as they face an army of thousands of bandits.]''

*'''Po''': ''[narrating]'' But hanging out would have to wait. 'Cause when you're facing the ten thousand demons of Demon Mountain— ''[He slices off the heads of the bandits' spears with a shiny green sword and leaps into battle with the Five.]'' ... there's only one thing that matters. And that's—

*''[Freezing in mid-air, the Five suddenly talk to the warrior in a strange voice.]''

*'''Monkey''': Po! Get up!

*'''Tigress''': You'll be late for work!

*'''Dragon Warrior''': Whuh?

*''[The warrior suddenly falls, and Po lands hard on a wooden floor of his own room, revealing that the whole battle was actually a dream. He tries to clear his head and wake up.]''

*'''Mr. Ping''': Po! Get up!

*''[Po looks around his room and see that it's filled with various kung fu posters (including a poster featuring all of the Five) and souvenirs, and a wooden version of the Sword of Heroes (the green sword). Po sighs and attempts to kick himself to his feet, but finds his belly too worthy a foe.]''

*'''Mr. Ping''': Po! What are you doing up there?

*'''Po''': Uh, nothing! ''[He hops to his feet and faces his action figures.]'' Hi-ya! Monkey! Mantis! Crane! Viper! Tigress! Grrraahh—

*''[Outside on the balcony of the neighboring house, a pig watering flowers stares at Po. Po tries to play it cool and then quickly ducks out of sight.]''

* '''Mr. Ping: '''Po! Let's go! You'd be late for work!

* '''PO:''' Coming!
''[He takes a ninja star from his floor and chucks it at the wall. It bounces off. He throws the star again, but it bounces off again. He quickly picks it up and heads downstairs where he trips and falls the rest of the way. He falls flat on his face on the kitchen floor. A panda-shaped shadow looms over Po.]''
* '''PO:''' Sorry, Dad.

* '''MR. PING:''' 'Sorry' doesn't make the noodles.
[Reveals that the shadow is actually caused by a basket being carried by a small goose. Po gets to work in the shop's small kitchen.]
* '''MR. PING:''' What were you doing up there, all that noise?

* '''PO:''' Oh, nothing. Just had a crazy dream.

* '''MR. PING:''' About what?

* '''PO:''' Huh?

* '''MR. PING:''' What were you dreaming about? ''[He puts down the basket and begins chopping vegetables next to Po as he listens.]''

* '''PO:''' What was I... uh... I was dreaming about... ''[He sees Mr. Ping listening expectantly, and can't bring himself to say the truth. He glances down at the bowl he's holding.]'' Uh... noodles.

* '''MR. PING:''' ''[He stops chopping vegetables.]'' Noodles? You were really dreaming about noodles?

* '''PO:''' Uh, yeah. What else would I be dreaming about?
''[Po hands a bowl of noodles to a customer, then realizes his throwing star is sitting in it.]''
* '''PO:''' ''[to customer]'' Oh, careful, that soup is... sharp!

* '''MR. PING:''' Oh, happy day! My son, finally having the noodle dream! ''[He begins rummaging through something and arrives with an apron and a noodle hat. He ties the apron around Po's waist and places the noodle hat in Po's paws.]'' You don't know how long I have been waiting for this moment. This is a sign, Po!

* '''PO:''' ''[He looks at the noodle hat nervously.]'' Uh... a sign of what?

* '''MR. PING:''' You are almost ready to be entrusted with the secret ingredient of my "Secret Ingredient Soup". And then you will fulfill your destiny and take over the restaurant! ''[He quickly runs over to section of wall with three portraits and points at them accordingly.]'' Just as I took it over from my father, who took it over from his father, who won it from a friend in a game of ''mahjong''.

* '''PO:''' Dad, Dad, Dad, it was just a dream. ''[chuckles nervously]''

* '''MR. PING:''' No, it was ''the'' dream. We are noodle folk. Broth runs through our veins. ''[While saying this, he hands two customers their bowls without even looking at them.]''

* '''PO:''' But Dad, didn't you ever, I dunno, want to do something else? Something besides noodles?

* '''MR. PING:''' Actually, when I was young and crazy, I thought about running away and learning how to make tofu.

* '''PO:''' So why didn't you?!

* '''MR. PING:''' Oh, because it was a stupid dream. Can you imagine ''me'' making tofu? ''[He laughs at the thought.]'' No. We all have our place in this world. Mine is here. And yours is—

* '''PO:''' I know. Is here.

* '''MR. PING:''' No, it's at tables two, five, seven, and twelve. ''[He loads Po's arms with bowls of soup.]'' Service with a smile!

*[''Later Ash and his friends were in China.]''

*'''Ash Ketchum: ''' Well, we're here, everyone. Back in ancient China.

* 
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'''Gurgi: '''Look at that temple up here.

==Shifu's training session with the Furious Five/Oogway's vision==

[''Up that the Jade Palace. An old red panda is playing a flute. He is surrounded by the bushes and trees that nestle between the Training Hall. From behind the bushes, stealthy dark shapes move in the foreground. He is still playing and seems oblivious. Five figures explode from the undergrowth simultaneously, diving on him. He moves like lightning, the flute now wielded like a staff. He deflects, blocks, dodges, parries, and the attackers go flying. They roll and pick themselves up, turning to face him, who is now standing—poised—ready for their next move.]''
* '''SHIFU:''' Well done, students... ''if'' you were trying to disappoint me.''[He uses his flute to point at the Five, who respectfully bow as their name is mentioned.]''

* '''SHIFU:''' Tigress, you need more ferocity. Monkey, greater speed. Crane—height. Viper—subtlety. Mantis

* '''ZENG:''' Master Shifu.''[Shifu suddenly points the flute at a scared palace goose.]''

* '''SHIFU:''' ''[impatiently]'' What?!

* '''ZENG:''' ''[startled]'' Aah! It's Master Oogway. He wants to see you.
''[Shifu looks up, concerned. He runs to the Jade Palace, which is lined with palace geese. The door bursts open. Shifu enters and comes to a halt. Candles and emerald lighting fill the room. He takes a deep breath and bows.]''
* '''SHIFU:''' Master Oogway? You summoned me. 
''[He looks up, still bowing.]'' Is something wrong?''[He looks up at a tortoise shell perfectly balanced on a thin wooden staff. Master Oogway, a wise and elderly tortoise, emerges slowly from his meditative position and climbs down effortlessly.]''
* '''OOGWAY:''' Why must something be wrong for me to want to see my old friend?

* '''SHIFU:''' So... nothing's wrong?

* '''OOGWAY:''' Well, I didn't say that.
''[Shifu looks up, concerned. Oogway opens his mouth... and blows out a candle. And another candle. And another. And another. Oogway opens his mouth to say something, then blows out another candle. Finally, an impatient Shifu uses his kung fu to blow them all out.]''
* '''SHIFU:''' You were saying?

* '''OOGWAY:''' I have had a vision: Tai Lung will return.
''[Shifu looks stricken. Quick, impressionistic images of a large, shadowy figure (Tai Lung) flash in his mind. Shifu is rattled.]''
* '''SHIFU:''' That is impossible! He is in prison!

* '''OOGWAY:''' Nothing is impossible.

* '''SHIFU:''' ''[He stares in horror for a second before reacting.]'' Zeng!
''[Zeng comes flying in, and Shifu gets in his face.]''
* '''SHIFU:''' Fly to Chorh-Gom Prison and tell them to double the guards, double their weapons. Double everything! Tai Lung does not leave that prison!

* '''ZENG:''' Yes, Master Shifu!
''[The goose flies off, but then hits a column. Then he is off. Back on Oogway, as he walks away from Shifu.]''
* '''OOGWAY:''' ''[to himself]'' One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.

* '''SHIFU:''' ''[He rushes back to Oogway.] ''W-we have to do something. We can't just let him march on the Valley and take his revenge! He'll, he'll—

* '''OOGWAY:''' ''[He looks into the water of the Moon Pool.]'' Your mind is like this water, my friend. When it is agitated, it becomes difficult to see. But if you allow it to settle, the answer becomes clear.
''[Shifu and Oogway stare into the pool. Oogway settles the water with his staff, revealing the reflection of an intricately-carved dragon clutching a scroll in its mouth.]''
* '''SHIFU:''' ''[He looks up.]'' The Dragon Scroll...

* '''OOGWAY:''' ''[Looking up with Shifu.]'' It is time.

* '''SHIFU:''' ''[Looks at Oogway.]'' But who? Who is worthy to be trusted with the secret to limitless power? To become... the Dragon Warrior?

* '''OOGWAY:''' ''[A short pause.]'' I don't know. ''[He smiles. Shifu stares at him.]''
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==Ash and his gang meet Po for the first time/Dragon Warrior tournament==

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*'''Ash Ketchum''': Uh, Po, are you sure about this? This seems pretty dangerous.

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==Ash and gang meet Shifu, Oogway, and the Furious Five==
*''[Po wakes up from his impact as the Furious Five look down at him.]''

*'''Po''': ''[groans]'' What's going on? Where, uh... ''[sees Oogway pointing at him]'' What are you pointing...Oh! Okay. Sorry. I just wanted to see who the Dragon Warrior was.

*'''Oogway''': How interesting.

*'''Ash Ketchum''': Po! ''[appears in the crowd with his friends]'' Are you okay?

* '''Po''': Yeah, I think so

*''[The crowd gasps in surprise. The Furious Five, Shifu, and Oogway are also surprised.]''

*'''Brock''': Why is everyone looking at us like that?

*'''Oogway''': Well, wax my shell! Humans and dinosaurs! Here in the Valley of Peace!

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* '''Ash Ketchum''': Look we're sorry for this happened but we'll get our new friend to the doctor to check over, now if you'll excuse u- huh?! (felt something got his leg and see Monkey got one of his leg) what the?!

*'''Monkey''': ''[observing Ash's legs]'' Look at that! He's got long legs like you, Crane.

*'''Crane''': That he does. ''[laughs]'' But he sure doesn't have a beak, wings, or any feathers either.

*'''Mantis''': He doesn't have an antenna. That's for sure.

*'''Viper''': (observed Ash's skin) And his skin doesn't have scales like me, very interesting.

*'''Tigress''': ''[sniffs Pikachu]'' What an unusual creature.

*'''Shifu''': Ahem! Aren't you all forgetting something? The Dragon Warrior?

*'''Crane''': Oh, yeah.

*'''Misty''': Dragon Warrior?

*'''Taran''': What's that?

*'''Tigress''': Master, are you pointing at me?

*'''Oogway''': Him.

*'''Po''': Who?

*'''Oogway''': You.

*'''Po''': Me?

*'''Littlefoot''': You're pointing at Po? Why?

*'''Oogway''': ''[lifts Po's arm with his staff]'' The universe has brought us the Dragon Warrior!

*'''Po''': What?

*'''The Furious Five''': What?!

*'''Shifu''': What?!

*'''Ash and gang''': What?!

*'''Mr. Ping''': What?!

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*'''Ash Ketchum''': Po? The Dragon Warrior?!

*'''Brock''': How is this possible?

*'''Misty:''' I don't know.
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==Warn the Guards about Tai Lung Escaping==
*(Somewhere in the snow part of China Zeng was seen making his way to Chorn-Gom Prison)
*(Zeng crashes to the entry of the Prison where two Rhino Guards aimed their spheres at him)
*Zeng: (Panics) Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait, I bring a message. From Master Shifu.
*(The Rhino Guards were surprised)
*(They take Zeng inside)
*Vachir: What? Double the guard?! Extra precautions?! Your prison may not be adequate?!
*(Zeng was awkwardly laughing before panic as the Rhino Guards looked at him angry)
*Vachir: (to Zeng) You doubt my prison security?!
*Zeng: (nervously) Absolutely not. Shifu does, I'm just the messenger. (gulps)
*Vachir: I'll give you a message for your Master Shifu.
*(Zeng panics nervously)
*Vachir: Escape from Chorn-Gom Prison is impossible!
*Zeng: (Looks down nervously) Oh!
*(Vachir pats Zeng's back hard as he panics)
*Vachir: (laughs) Impressive, isn't it? (chuckles)
*Zeng: (nervous) Um, it's very impressive. It's-It's very impressive.
*Vachir: One way in, one way out! One thousand guards, and one prisoner.
*Zeng: (nervous) Yes, except that prisoner is Tai Lung.
*(Looks at 5 Rhino Guards above him and Vachir the warden nervously as they look at him)
*Vachir: (to one of his Guards) Take us down.
*(Their elevator gets lowered down)
*(Vachir scares Zeng by moving the elevator)
*Zeng: (scares) What are you doing?!
*(Vachir laughs)
*(They continued going down till they reach the bottom)
*(They then arrive at the prisoner's location)
*Zeng: Oh, my!
*(The drawbridge door lowers and reveals Tai Lung)
*Zachir: Behold, Tai Lung.
*(Zeng was scared)
*Zeng: (nervous) I'll uh... I'm just gonna wait, right here.
*Zachir: (chuckles) It's nothing to worry about. It's perfectly safe.
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==At Jade Palace==
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==Tai Lung escapes==

==Oogway ascends==

*'''Shifu''': [running up to the peach tree to meet with Oogway] Master! Master!
*'''Oogway''': Hmm?
*'''Shifu''': I have very bad news.
*'''Oogway''': Aah, Shifu. There is just news. There is no good or bad.
*'''Shifu''': Master, your vision was right. Tai Lung has broken out of prison, and he's on his way!
[Oogway looks shocked]
*'''Oogway''': That is bad news. if you do not believe that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.
*'''Shifu''': The panda? Master, that panda is not the Dragon Warrior. He wasn't even meant to be here! It was an accident!
*'''Oogway''': There are no accidents.
*'''Shifu''': [sighs] Yes, I know. You've said that already... Twice.
*'''Oogway''': Well, that was no accident either.
*'''Shifu''': Thrice.
*'''Oogway''': My friend, the panda will never fulfill his destiny, nor you yours, until you let go of the illusion of control.
*'''Shifu''': Illusion?
*'''Oogway''': Yes. [gestures to the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom] Look at this tree, Shifu. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, nor make it bear fruit before it's time.
*'''Shifu''': But there are things we can control. [kicks the tree causing several peaches to fall] I can control when the fruit will fall. [one hits him on the head, and he grumbles] And I can control... [tosses the peach in the air and chops it in half] Where to plant the seed. [punches a hole in the ground and catches the seed] That is no illusion, Master. [throws the seed into the hole]
*'''Oogway''': Ah, yes, but no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
*'''Shifu''': But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!
*'''Oogway''': Maybe it can... [covers the seed in dirt] ...If you are willing to guide it, to nurture it. To believe in it.
*'''Shifu''': But how? How? I need your help, master.
*'''Oogway''': No, you just need to believe. Promise me, Shifu. Promise me you will believe.
*'''Shifu''': I...I will try.
*'''Oogway''': Good. [sees petals floating around him] My time has come. You must continue your journey without me. [hands Shifu his staff]
*'''Shifu''': What...What are you...? [Oogway backs into the swirling petals] Master, you can't leave me!
*'''Oogway''': [last words as he starts to vanish] You must believe.
*'''Shifu''': Master!
[Oogway disappears, and Shifu stares sadly after him]

==Furious Five vs. Tai Lung==

==The Dragon Scroll==
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*Ash Ketchum: Crane!
*Misty: What happened?
*Crane: It was Tai Lung. We were no match for his nerve attack.
*Shifu: He has gotten stronger. (revives Mantis)
*Po: Who? Tai Lung? Stronger?
*Littlefoot: How can he be that strong?
*Eilonwy: Maybe he learned a few tricks during his time in prison.
*Taran: Probably.
*Monkey: (accidentally punches Po after Shifu revives him) He's too fast! Sorry, Po.
*Tigress: (as Shifu revived her; ashamed) I thought we could stop him.
*Shifu: He could've killed you.
*Mantis: Why didn't he?
*Shifu: (while reviving Viper) So you could come back here and strike fear into our hearts. But it ''won't'' work.

==Shifu vs. Tai Lung==

==Po vs. Tai Lung==

*Tai Lung: Who dares back-sass Tai Lung?!
*Misty: That would be us! We'd say you're making a big mistake in blaming Shifu!

== Ending ==
(Back to Patchy)
* '''Patchy the Pirate: '''Ahoy, children! I'm back! I hope all you boys and girls enjoyed the show because it's time for you to walk the plank! [Screen reads: PLEASE STAND BY] Oh, sorry, kids. What I meant to say was it's time for fan mail! [blows horn]
* '''Old-time crowd:''' Hooray!
* '''Patchy the Pirate:''' And now, the moment you've all been waiting for, so get ready to blow milk out of your nose because we're gonna open a letter! The envelope please Potty. Thank you, my fine feathered assistant.
* '''Potty:''' [Potty has a lighten fuse on his head] Brawk, you're not welcome.
* '''Patchy the Pirate:''' [Patchy blows his nose] Hey, Potty, do you smell something? Oh, Potty! That fuse in your head! I told you we're not doing that stunt!
* '''Potty:''' Brawk, I didn't get the memo! Brawk! [Potty blows up along with Patchy; Patchy coughs up a feather and recovers from the blast]
* '''Patchy the Pirate:''' Well, that’s it for Patchy's Pick. Hooray! [Potty collapses to the floor]
THE END!!!
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