Pooh's Adventures of Beethoven/Transcript

This is the transcript for Pooh's Adventures of Beethoven.

Meeting the Newton family

(Just then, the doorbell rang)

George Newton: Oh, I wonder who that could be.

Alice Newton: I'll get the door.

(Alice answers the door, revealing to be Pooh, Ash, and their friends)

Pooh Bear: Good morning, ma'am.

Alice Newton: Good morning, everyone. Come on in.

(The heroes come into the house.)

George Newton: (see's Pikachu) Hey, who's that little guy?

(George is about to touch Pikachu's cheeks and Ash stopped him.)

Ash Ketchum: Careful, sir. He was 100,000 volts of electricity stored in his cheeks if you touch his cheeks, you'll get shocked.

George Newton: Oh, okay, son. Thanks for the warning.

(However, Pikachu rubs against George's leg)

-

George Newton: We can't have a dog. We can't have a dog!

Alice Newton: Honey, you can't show a child a puppy and then take it away two minutes later.

George Newton: I didn't show a child a puppy. It's obviously lost. You occupy the kids, I'll run it down to the pound.

Alice Newton: Oh, no. No way. If the owner doesn't claim it, it'll be destroyed. I'm not going to live with that.

George Newton: If we keep it, the house will be destroyed!

Alice Newton: Honey, it's just a dog. Millions of people have dogs.

George Newton: Oh, no, not people like me! Dogs sniff, they lick, they chew, they drool, they scratch... Alice, they have parasites.

Alice Newton: [sarcastically] Oh, Gosh, yeah...

George Newton: The kids'll lose interest, I'll have to take care of it. It'll grow to be enormous, it'll take over the yard, the bushes will die and the lawn'll look terrible and when the dog finally settles down, it'll die. And everybody will so upset, we'll have to go get another puppy, the whole thing will start all over again. You understand?

Alice Newton: No, honey, could you be more specific?

(The kids want to keep the puppy, but George doesn't.)

George Newton: It's my decision. I mean, I have decided.

Ryce Newton: I knew it.

(A pause as George looks at his kids.)

George Newton: You'd better think of something to name him because when I come home and he's destroyed my house, I wanna know what to call him!

Alice Newton: (choosing a name out of a hat) OK, the dog's name will be...

(She takes out a piece of paper, but doesn't read it out loud and looks at George in silence.)

George Newton: You asked for my input.

George Newton: [the family is arguing about what to call the puppy] This is ridiculous! It's a dog, he doesn't have preferences! You could call him Ding-Dong Head and he wouldn't know the difference!

Emily Newton: Yes, he would! He'll tell us what he wants to be called.

(Emily starts playing the famous four-note opening motif of Beethoven's Fifth Symphony on the piano. The puppy responds to it with barks.)

George Newton: Beethoven.

Outing with Beethoven/Visiting Ryce

(Beethoven has got into George's bed and is licking his neck.)

George Newton: Oh, baby. Oh, baby. It's not even Saturday night. Oh, Alice, you drive me crazy. Is daddy's little girl being naughty tonight?

Alice Newton: (has just walked into the room) George who are you talking to?

(George turns over and comes face-to-face with Beethoven.)

George Newton: (screams, then chases Beethoven out of the house) How dare you! How dare you! Are you crazy? Did you think you were gonna get away with it? (sees Beethoven crawl under the hole he dug back into his kennel) Oh, that's how you do it! I'll put a stop to that! You've ruined my life! You've ruined my furniture, you've ruined my clothes! My family likes you more than they like me! Why? All you do is drool and shed and eat! But you're never getting out of there again! Never! Do we understand each other? Do we?

(The sprinklers come on, ending his rant.)

-

-

Ryce Newton: Hi, guys.

Pooh Bear: Hello, Ryce.

Tigger: Whatcha doing, Ryce?

Ryce Newton: Miss Simpkins made me stay after.

Piglet: Really, how come?

Ryce Newton: Let's just say I didn't pay attention in class.

Daphne Blake: What was on your mind?

Ryce Newton: See over there?

Scrappy-Doo: Yeah?

Scooby-Doo: Who's that?

Defending Ted

Ash Ketchum: Hey! Leave Ted alone!

Pikachu: (angrily) Pika!

Tigger: Yeah, Brunos! What's he ever done to you?

Timon: Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?!

Pumbaa: Yeah, you mess with Ted, and I'll knock you all down!

(Spark begin to sputter from Pikachu's cheeks)

Meeting Dr. Varnick

Dr. Varnick: Here for his shots?

George Newton: Yes.

Dr. Varnick: Well he'll be a little groggy this evening.

George Newton: That'll be nice.

(Dr. Varnick has warned George about St. Bernards attacking people.)

Alice Newton: George, come on. Beethoven isn't even remotely dangerous. He'd never hurt the kids. He might take a bite out of you, though.

George Newton: First snarl, any kind of weirdness and he's gone.

Alice Newton: Weirdness? What should I watch for, hon? Wearing my clothes around the house?

Rescuing Emily from drowning

Pikachu: Pika Pika!

Ash: Huh? What's the matter, Pikachu?

Misty: She's drowning! Staryu, go and help her!

(Beethoven has saved Emily from drowning in the pool)

Emily Newton: I love you, too. Thanks Beethoven, you saved my life, but you better go home now. Mom said to stay in the back yard.

Devonia Pest: (whilst playing the organ) You kids might be interested to know that I'm a featured performer Saturday nights at the Padded Zebra. (laughs)

(Ryce and Ted look out the window and notice Emily in the backyard pool)

Ryce Newton: Oh, my gosh! Emily's in the pool!

Devonia Pest: The POOL?!!

Ryce Newton: Emily!

Devonia Pest: What are you doing in the pool, young lady?! Get out of there this instant! You want to get me into trouble?

Ryce Newton: Emily, are you alright?

Emily Newton: I fell in.

Ryce Newton: Oh, Emily. You must've been so scared.

Emily Newton: I thought I was gonna die.

Devonia Pest: Oh, you poor little thing. Now, you were never in any real danger now, were you? Now, we don't want you to get into trouble, so we'll this be our little secret!

(Misty glares angrily at Devonia)

Ryce Newton: (pushes Emily out of the way and furiously to Devonia) I'd like to call my mother please.

Devonia Pest: Your mother?

Ryce Newton: Immediately.

(After Emily's pool accident at Devonia's, Alice takes the kids home)

Devonia Pest: She must've snuck out while I was watching Ted and Ryce. It was hot out, so I guess she wanted to take a little swim!

???: She was playing and then she accidentally fell in the pool while you were too busy playing your organ!

Alice Newton: And where were you while all this was happening?

Devonia Pest: I was where I was supposed to be: Inside, watching the other two. If Emily had stayed where I put her, none of this would've happened. If you ask me, what these children need is a little discipline.

Heroes: Discipline?!

???: You're the one who was playing your organ while she was in the pool and you were supposed to keep an eye on her!

???: She could've drowned!

???: Some babysitter you are!

Alice Newton: I believe they're right. What these children need is their mother. You're fired.

(After Alice has fired Devonia for not watching all of the kids)

George Newton: Honey, it was an accident!

Alice Newton: So what?

George Newton: We can't throw out the option of having a babysitter just because we had a bad one. We'll find somebody really responsible to look after the kids.

Alice Newton: Over my dead body.

An unpleasant visit from the Wilsons

(George sits on the porch after Beethoven has given Brad and Brie a well-deserved ride down the street, thereby nullifying their deal with George)

George Newton: I really don't like our dog.

Alice Newton: I really don't like those people, George. I don't trust them. I don't want their money. I know my opinion doesn't matter, but I'm not interested in expanding. If I had been home instead of helping you impress those morons, Emily wouldn't have fallen in the pool. And I'm not re-entering the work force, George. You're gonna have to do this on your own. And you will. Somehow, you'll make your fortune. And tucked away behind you deep in the shadows will be me and the kids.

George Newton: That's how you see me. Suddenly, I'm a lousy husband and father. Everything was just fine until Beethoven came into our lives. I've tried to be patient, but I've had it. The dog has to go.

Alice Newton: I'm proud of Beethoven. Those two idiots insulted your kids, they treated me like dirt, and he was the only one of us who had the nerve to give them the ride they deserved. I'm going to bed. (heads back inside)

George Newton: My dream is going down the drain, and you're worried about a dog.

Alice Newton: Your family's going down the drain, and you're worried about a dream.

Dr. Varnick takes Beethoven away

Dr. Varnick: He just lunged at me.

Pooh Bear: (shocked) He what?!

Tigger: (sputters) What?! That's ridiculous!

Emily Newton: (angrily) That's not true! We saw you! You hit Beethoven!

Ash Ketchum: Yeah, we saw the whole thing!

Pikachu: Pika!

Rabbit: This is an outrage hurting Beethoven like that!

Alice Newton: Guys, please!

Ash Ketchum: (to Dr. Varnick) Listen, buster, you'd better get out of here before have my Pikachu shock you with his electric attacks!

Pikachu: (angrily) Pika!

Shaggy Roger: Or, better yet, I'll let Scooby loose on you!

Scooby-Doo: Yeah, and I'll give you a Scooby-Smack! (growls angrily at him)

Dr. Varnick: Why would I hit Beethoven? I patted him on the head. It's possible that from a distance the children...

Emily Newton: Liar!

George Newton: Emily! Emily!

Alice Newton: I'm sorry. Everything's all right.

Dr. Varnick: It's perfectly natural the child would want to defend her dog.

George Newton: Let's call an ambulance.

Dr. Varnick: No, no, no. I'll take care of it. I'll take care of this myself.

George Newton: I'm terribly sorry. I mean, he's never done anything like this before.

Dr. Varnick: Once an animal crosses the line and attacks a human being, you can rest assured he'll do it again. Of course, next time it could be one of your children.

George Newton: I'm very, very sorry. Let me help.

Dr. Varnick: Mr. Newton, we have a real problem here. The law is very clear when it comes to dealing with this kind of thing. Unless you bring the animal to my office immediately, I'm afraid I'll be forced to press charges. Mmm.

George Newton: I'm so sorry.

George Newton: (driving Beethoven to the vet to be put down) My dad had to take my dog to the vet to be put down. I hated him for it. Now I'm doing it myself. I know you don't believe me, but I don't want to do this.

Saving Beethoven/Final Battle

George Newton: Did I do the wrong thing?

Alice Newton: I don't know, honey. Beethoven made this house real. He put the dents in it. I know he slobbered and he smelled bad, but he loved us. Even you. I just hope your motives were pure, and you did this just for the safety of the kids. Because I really hate to think that we sold Beethoven down the river for a piece of carpet or a chance to sell more air freshener.

George Newton: Oh, come on. It had nothing to do with carpet or air freshener. You saw what he did to the vet.

Alice Newton: I know.

George Newton: Don't even say that.

Alice Newton: Yes, but we don't know why he did it. Maybe the vet didn't hit him, but maybe he handled him too rough or something. George, Emily's really sticking to this. Have we ever known her to attack an adult and accuse them of lying?

George Newton: No, but why would a vet say something like that?

???: Beethoven didn't attack him; he was faking his injuries and then he hit Beethoven!

George Newton: Guys, not now.

???: We saw the whole thing!

George Newton: Beethoven attacked him and that's that! Ever since he came into this family, he's been a disgrace and wrecking the place.

???: Oh, so what are you saying there? That how we take care of Beethoven our way isn't as good as we take care of Beethoven your way?

George Newton: Your way? You mean my family's way. Can't you see our kids only care for the dog?

???: (gasps) George! (sternly) Shame on you. Ryce, Ted, and Emily wouldn't do that.

George Newton: You have got to trust me on this. Don't you understand there's something wrong with that dog? I get so fed up every time I'm near him.

???: Oh, so we're supposed to listen to you because you think Beethoven is nothing but a mess? I'm starting to think that you being cautious about Beethoven is just you being jealous.

George Newton: Jealous? Of Beethoven?

???: Yeah! We were helping him embrace his future there and you're just holding us back!

George Newton: Oh, I'll hold you back alright. From Beethoven.

???: You always hated Bethoven!

George Newton: I never said that.

???: No. But you were thinking it.

???: You always locked him up in that pen, leaving him there like he's a prisoner!

Shaggy Rogers: Like, Scoob here's a dog and he doesn't bother me.

Scooby-Doo: Yeah!

???: Shaggy's right! What's wrong with having a dog, George? What's wrong with that?

George Newton: I--

(George didn't respond as the heroes glared at him in disapproval)

Geroge Newton: (sighs) You're right, guys. I did have a hatred towards Beethoven. Maybe I am a horrible husband and father.

Alice Newton: Well, instead of listening to some guy we've met only twice in our lives, maybe we should try listening to our own child. Honey, please something doesn't make sense. Can't we just go down there and talk to him?

George Newton: Oh, what do you want me to do?

(George is mocking a conversation between him and Dr. Varnick)

George Newton: Uh, "Dr. Varnick, are you sure you didn't hit our dog?" "Oh, yes, Mr. Newton, I just remembered, I did hit your dog." C'mon!

Alice Newton: You c'mon! Please, it would make me feel better. Let's just go.

(Ryce, Ted, and Emily opens the door and come outside)

Ryce Newton: I'm coming with you.

Emily Newton: So am I.

Ted Newton: We're all going with you.

(???)

George Newton: I'm terribly sorry.

Ryce Newton: We want our dog back!

Ted Newton: Yeah!

Emily Newton: Where's Beethoven?!

???: We came to get him back!

Alice Newton: All right, kids, let Daddy handle this.

Dr. Varnick: Mr. Newton, what can I do for you?

Ryce Newton: We want our dog back!

Dr. Varnick: Oh, I'm terribly sorry. It's too late. The dog's been destroyed.

Ryce Newton: No!

Ted Newton: Dad!

George Newton: Now, wait a minute. Wait a minute. I was told this wouldn’t happen until tomorrow.

Ryce Newton: I don't believe you.

(Ryce tries to barge in, but Varnick restrains her)

George Newton: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Take your hands off her! What are you... (he looks at Dr. Varnick's "injured" arm)

Emily Newton: I told you he was lying!

???: He's been faking it the whole time!

George Newton: What the heck are you trying to pull?

(The Newtons and heroes discover that Dr. Varnick has been deceiving them. They barge into the veterinary surgery looking for Beethoven)

Dr. Varnick: You can't come in here. This is private property.

Ted Newton: Beethoven?

(They go to the back, but he isn't there, despite the receptionist telling George earlier that they were going to keep him there overnight and put him down the next day)

Emily Newton: He's not here.

Ryce Newton: Nobody's here!

Dr. Varnick: All right, Hold it right there. You all have no right to be in here! Out! All of you!

George Newton: Where's my dog?

Delia Ketchum: You better tell us where Beethoven is!

Dr. Varnick: I don't have to answer your questions. You ordered that dog destroyed and it was done.

???: We think you're bluffing.

Dr. Varnick: I am not bluffing.

Ash Ketchum: Tell us where Beethoven is, or I'll have Pikachu shock you!

Pikachu: (sparks fly from his cheeks) Pika! Pika!

Shaggy Rogers: Like I'll sic Scoob on you, too!

Scooby-Doo: Yeah! (snarls)

Dr. Varnick: (in Mr. Welling's voice) (to the heroes) If you were my kids, I'd punish you!

???: (in Stymie's voice) If we were your kids, we'd punish ourselves!

Dr. Varnick: Leave the premises posthase!

???: (in Spanky's voice) You can't treat people this way, mister!

Dr. Varnick: You're not people, you're kids. Now get out.

(Enraged, George and Delia grip Varnick's collar)

Dr. Varnick: You hit me and sic your pets on me, I'll have you both put in jail for assault and battery!

(George and Delia let go of Varnick. Then suddenly, they punch him in the face, knocking him backwards into an empty animal cage)

Ryce Newton: Whoa!

Ash Ketchum: (in Henry Rowengartner's voice) All right, Mom!

Ted Newton: Dad!

Alice Newton: Honey!

Emily Newton: That was amazing.

???: Wow, George. I didn't know you had it in you.

Ted Newton: Dad, you were awesome. You were really cool.

Alice Newton: I never find you more attractive.

(???)

-He said our dog bit him.|-But he didn`t really. Tell him. There were no bite marks on his arm! `"So what?`" What do you mean? l`d like to file a report on you! -They`re not going to help us?|-Not this year. -Dad! Dr. Varnick.|-Look! Let`s follow him. Maybe he`ll lead us to Beethoven. Hold your door. Hold your door. Shut it. Dad, haven`t you ever followed

Ending

(The scene changes to the Newton's living room where the news report is on TV. The Newtons, Beethoven, and the heroes watch the news. Ted sits with Scooby and Scrappy while Togepi sits on Emily's lap, Pikachu sits on George's lap as he pets him gently while Beethoven sits with Pooh Bear and his pals)

George Newton: Good night, honey.

Alice Newton: Good night.

George Newton: Sleep tight. Good night, Beethoven.

(The picture zooms out to reveal lots of other dogs sleeping in the bedroom.)

Alice Newton: Good night, Sparky.

George Newton: Good night, Mitch.

Alice Newton: Good night, Murphy.

George Newton: Good night, Sally.

Alice Newton: Good night, Lacey.

George Newton: Good night, Fred.

Alice Newton: Good night, Eliot.