Cowman and Ratboy/Transcript

Here's the 3rd episode from Season 1 of Winnie the Pooh Goes Back at the Barnyard.

Script

The Beginning

(The scene opens up with Pip and Otis sun-bathing. A chicken comes in with a complaint)

• Chicken: Otis, you have to do something. Pig is stinking up the barnyard again.
• Otis: Well you know, it tricky to do me. Look I'm not really into stink either. When you way stink scale with confertation...
• Chicken: Oh, honestly Otis. Sometimes your so...mild manner. (leaves)
• Otis: She bought it. Ready for action, Chum?
• Pip: Dude, I'm always ready.

(They head for a shack and changed into their costumes)

• Peck: Ah, there's nothing like a nice, relaxing game of...

(Freddy and Peck got hit by Cowman's garage door, Otis and Pip drove off. Cuts to Pig)

• Pig: Stunky, Stunky. I love my Stunky. Oh, you getting brush don't ya? You are so... (He heard a noise) Who's there?
• Otis: I'm your worst nightmare dirtbag. I'm Cowman.
• Pip: And I'm his sidekick, Ratboy.
• Pig: Oh come Otis. Not this stupid hero thing again.
• Otis: That skunk will smell sweeter once its has a whiff of my "Cow-Gas".(sprays it at Stunky and in Pig's eyes)
• Pig: Ah lemony fresh scent! It burns, It burns. (runs into the door and is crushed by ahaystack and another cow)
• Pip: Ha Ha, foiled again!

(Tigger, Cosmo, and Lincoln comes in)

• Tigger: Hey Otis, what are you doing?
• Otis: Oh I am not this "Otis", I am... Cowman...
• Pip: And Ratboy..
• Otis and Pip: Superheroes!
• Cosmo: Wow, you guys are superheroes?
• Otis: Yep! Possibly the best heroes in the county area.
• Lincoln: Cool! May we join you two being superheroes too?
• Otis: Well, I don't see why not.
• Pip: But, what are your superhero names?
• Tigger: Just call me The Mask Offender!
• Cosmo: And Super-No Cosmo!
• Lincoln: Call me Savy. Ace Savy.
• Otis: Cool ones! Welcome aborad to the Superhero team!
• Pip: Yeah! (He hears something) Cowman, my super rat hearing is detecting more evil.
• Otis: Your ears are our strongest ally! Cowman..,
• Tigger: Masked Offender...
• Cosmo: Super-Not Cosmo...
• Lincoln: Ace Savy...
• Pip: And Ratboy...
• Everyone: Away!

(Outside, some of our heroes our exercising with Abby and Bessie)

• Bessie: Oh, this is just fantastic! Let's do hand pulling next and then we can poke ourselves with pins!
• Sunset Shimmer: I'm getting tired!
• Scruffy: Me too.
• Lucy: I can't believe we were talked into doing this.
• Timmy Turner: I can't believe you signed me up for this, Abby!
• Abby: Oh, quit whinning.
• CJ: Yeah, got to lose all that all fat one way or another.
• -Plus, think how much it will be worth later on.
• Mia: As they say, "No pain, No gain"
• -But it can it exhausting.
• Mindy: How much longer do we have to do this?
• Isabella: Just 2 more minute girls, and we'll have our Jazz-ercise patches.
• Wanda: How come your not tired, Abby?
• Leni: Yeah, can't you slow down?
• Abby: Sorry, guys, but jazz-ercise doesn't keep in shape unless you do it crazy fast! Like me! (going fast)
• Lynn: There is no way we can go that fast.
• Luna: Well at least it's almost over

(Suddenly, Otis ropes the radio)

• Otis: You can dance, but you can’t hide!
• Abby: Cowman. NOOOO!

(Otis pulls the radio away, but it hits the mill, and wheat lands on the group)

• Otis: Uh... Just as Cowman planned!
• Pip: No, you said we were gonna come in and...
• Otis: Just as Cowman planned! (moos)
• Pip: (moos)
• Otis: No I just say moo.
• Pip: Oh, Okay. (squeaks)
• -Well, I'm plan to kick your sorry butts soon
• -Same here.
• Wanda: Yeah, when I get out of this, you're gonna get it Cosmo!
• Cadence Flynn: Yeah, you five are going down! Down, down, down!
• Timmy Turner: Yeah, Cosmo. I'll destroy you for this!
• Sunset Shimmer: Same goes for you too Tigger!
• Luna: And you too Lincoln!
• Tigger: Make a break for it!
• Cosmo: To the Non-Cosmo Mobile!

(Heroes retreated. Later, Mrs. Beady sees Otis and the heroes driving off) 

• Mrs. Beady: Nathan! (Mr. Beady wakes up) That cow next door is acting crazy again!
• Mr. Beady: You know crazy! (drinks his soda)
• Pip: Cowman! Mrs. Beady is spying on us again!
• Otis: Deploy the cow-maflauge!
• Pip: Yea..,what?
• Otis: It’s the balloon with the ink in it.
• Pip: Ok.
• Cosmo: And I know what we can use to launch it! (brings out a catapult)
• Lincoln: Perfect.
• Pip: Ok, that will work. So, balloon with ink away!
• Mrs. Beady: I'll show you mister Lump. I'll get cow and his friends on videotape and I'll... (A balloon is thrown at her) Maybe I'll get a wash going.

(Everyone else comes in injured and angry)

• Everyone: Otis!!!
• Otis: No need to thank us! (moos)
• Jeremy Johnson: Actually we have a different reason to talk to you.
• Peck: Otis, we are so sick of this stupid game of yours.
• Rabbit: Tigger, didn't you learn anything the last time you were The Mask Offender?
• Timmy Turner: Did you learn anything either, Cosmo?
• Wanda: Yeah, you almost covered Dimmsdale with lava and water the last time you were a superhero!
• Timmy Turner: And don't forget a mad killing cat!
• Lola: And were so tired of you playing as that stupid comic book hero, Lincoln!
• Lincoln: Ace Savy is not stupid!
• Lynn: What ever Lincoln, this is got to to stop.
• Baljeet: Someone could have gotten really hurt.
• CJ: Mostly us!
• Adyson: Yeah and it's really annoying.
• Lori: You guys better stop this right now or we pulverize all of you.
• Bessie: Yeah, I hope you're faster than a speed butt whooping!
• Otis: Whoa, citizen no likey the heroes.
• Abby: Now you listen, Otis. Your idea of fighting evil around the barnyard by becoming superheroes is just plain...
• Freddy: Dumb! D...U...M...N...7...L! Dumb!
• Pip: Dude, there's no L in Dumb7!
• Lincoln: And there's no 7 or N in dumb either!
• Pig: You five are the worst superheroes ever!
• Otis: Oh, hey, excuse me everyone. We're awesome superheroes! We got cool costumes, wicked catchphrases...
• Cosmo: Cool rides...
• Tigger: Cool adventures to go on...
• Pip: And ingenues devices like Otis' bov-errang! Show him Otis!
• Otis: Check it out! (Otis throws the boomerang and hits Peck)
• Peck: I...I can't feel my legs!
• Winnie the Pooh: Hey guys, what's u...(The honey pot he's carrying spilled on the ground) Oh, Bother.
• Otis: Uh, Just put some ice on your toes and also glue the pot together and these should retur...To our vehicles!

(The heroes tip toed away)

The Middle

(The heroes are at a canyon judging their friends)

• Otis: Their just wrong, you guys. I know we have what it takes to be superheroes.
• Tigger: I know we do.
• Lincoln: We're way better than most of those other superhero back there.
• Otis: Yeah like the aqua dude!
• Tigger: You mean Aquaman?
• Otis: Yeah, I mean his tights are silly and how much crime really happens underwater.
• Pip: Car!

(As the car was coming, the others hide behind a tree)

• Pizza Dude 1#: Dude, I like can not drive and beat your high score at the same time.
• Pizza Dude 2#: Sure you can dude. Just let go of the round thingy.
• Pizza Dude 1#: Oh, yeah. Completely. (The dude are doing their handshake then screams as they were about to fall in the canyon)
• Pip: Fling me and Cosmo, Otis. We can make it!
• Otis: What I cant do that. I mean..
• Cosmo: Fling us!

(Otis fling Pip and Cosmo at the car and tied a rope to the tree and save the dudes)

• Pizza Dude 1#: We're gonna live!
• Pizza Dude 2#: We're livers
• Pizza Dude 1#: Dude, you totally said we're livers. 
• Pizza Dudes: Livers we're totally livers!
• Otis: This isn't what it looks like...I'm not a cow, I'm...
• Pizza Dude 1#: We know, your a superhero
• Pizza Dude 2#: Superhero doodle
• Otis: Uh yeah, right, right.
• Pizza Dude 2#: Awesome costume bro. Gotta get a snapo of the superdude that saved us.
• Pip: Don't forget us. We help too!
• Tigger, Cosmo and Linclon: Yep, that's right!
• Pizza Dude 2#: Whoa a sidekick with the power to super shrink! And a costume lepercaun, tiger and kid with white hair.
• Pizza Dude 1#: Yea, side-shrink.
• Heroes: Work for me.
• Pizza Dude 1#: What your name, dude?
• Otis: I'm Cowman.
• Tigger: I'm The Masked Offender.
• Cosmo: I'm Super-Not Cosmo.
• Lincoln: I'm Ace Savy.
• Pip: And I'm Ratboy.
• Pizza Dude 2#: Awesome. (Takes a picture of the heroes)

(Back at the Barnyard)

• Otis: In your faces, people. We are superheroes, we just performed a daring rescue.
• Pip: And got free pizza.
• Tigger: Yeah, you should see what we did.
• Lincoln: We were awesome.
• Cosmo: Yeah, I use my power and..
• Sunset Shimmer: Ok, what? Cosmo, you don't have powers.
• Timmy Turner: You know, Cosmo. He always talks or does stupid things.
• Otis: Any who, we were totally amazing out there.
• Abby: We know, guys, it's so excitin'.
• Otis: You know?
• Scruffy: Yeah. The news has been talking about it for the past hour.

(They watching Hilly Burford on the TV)

• Hilly Burford: And looks like the county has own group of superheroes. A group dressed in animal or flying man suit calling themselves "Cowman", "Super-Not Cosmo", "Ace Savy" and "The Mask Offender".
• Pip: And Ratboy. They never say Ratboy. (Squeaks)
• Otis: This is awesome! We're famous!
• Lincoln: So awesome in fact, we want the rest of you to join us as a team of superheroes.
• Bessie: Yeah I'll do that right after, never.
• Scruffy: I agree with Bessie.
• Lori: It will probably be boring anyway!
• Luan: Don't you mean "Super" boring (laughs) Get it? But seriously, I don't to do this.
• Lucy: No way I'm doing that either.
• Pip: Ah come on, fellas. We designed costumes for everyone.
• Olivia: Easy peasy, all we need to do is actually have superpowers. Too bad they're only in movies.
• Andrea: Maybe they're on to something. The county needs us.
• -What do you mean?
• Andrea: You know, like in the movies. Moltown has Giggle Girl with the power to make villains ticklish; Central City has Mushroom Man who turns criminals into fungus. We could be a new team of local superheroes. Daring rescues, adoring fans everywhere we go.
• Emma: Turning criminals into cheese!
• -Why cheese?
• Emma: What? I like cheese.
• Stephanie: So, we'd be like superheroes, but without any powers, or weapons, or cheese.
• Pip: Something like that.
• Otis: Together we can combat evil as "The Justice Brood".
• Pig: Ah, no way this tights will attenuate my love handles!
• Pip: Dude your 90% love handles. Your face is love handles.
• Pig: Can't I wear a poncho or something?
• Lisa: And besides, what kind of crime could happen in the county?
• Hilly Burford: Attention this just in a daring bank robbery has taken place the suspect was last scene heading south on Route One.
• Otis: All right.

(Farmer woke up. Everyone hid from the window)

• Otis: There's a robbery right near hear! We can totally nail this crook!
• Bessie: Let me think about it, no!
• Freddy: I'm allergic to bank robbers!
• Bessie: Well that's the first time i agreed with the freaky mongoose or whatever he is.
• Phineas Flynn: Well me and Ferb was a giant superhero called the Beak and we did fight a super villain once. But, we did that for fun.
• Ferb Fletcher: And for the laides.
• Candace Flynn: Yeah, no way.
• Jeremy Johnson: Yeah, me niether.
• Lynn: Sounds tempting, but no.
• Otis: Ok fine. You know what, more crime fighting for us, whiners! Come on guys, justice isn't going to serve itself.
• Tigger: Later, guys.
• Cosmo: See ya when we come back with more glory.
• Wanda: Nobody likes a showoff.

(Cut to Mrs. Beady's house)

• Mrs. Beady: Nathan, its that cow and his friends from next door whose making fun of me! 
• Mr. Beady: Flight control your losing your mind your going down pull up pull up!
• Pip: (sees the crook coming) Its the perp.
• Tigger: Ok, how do we stop him?
• Cosmo: Hey maybe we can use Super-Not Cosmo Sub?
• Lincoln: How would that works since we are no where near water?
• Cosmo: Right.
• Otis: Leave that to me old chums. Super lacto power, lactivate! (Sprays milk all over the road and the robber spinned out of control) You're coming with us, stinksack!
• Robber: Hey, your that Cowman, Masked Offender, Ace Savy and Super-Not from the TV! You guys'll never take me alive!
• Otis: Yes we will!
• Robber: No, guys'll won’t!
• Otis: Will too!
• Robber: Nuh-uh!
• Otis: A yeah-huh!
• Robber: Nun-uh!
• Otis: You might turn your self in now.
• Pip: Otis, I mean, Cowman, wait for us.
• Lincoln: Yeah, slow down!

(The robber breaks in Mrs. beady's house)

• Mrs. Beady: (screams) Nathan the crook from TV broke our door in!
• Mr. Beady: Your mad, gal. Just on of those salesman, they're getting bold.
• Robber: Quiet lady, Cowman and his sidekicks are on my tail.
• Mrs. Beady: Cowman and his sidekicks? Tell me everything.
• Otis: Cant' let him hurt Mrs.Beady. Then again. Nah better stop him. Cosmo you' ll come in with me!
• Cosmo: Got it!
• Otis: It is us, the Udder Advenger. We're justice Incownate. We are...(Whacked in the head) Sleepy. (faints)
• Cosmo: I'm feel funny. (faints)
• Robber: (laughing) Thanks for the help lady. Now I'm out of here.
• Mrs. Beady: Not so fast. You're in this with me, so get back inside!

(Another man comes in)

• ???: Wait just a minute!
• Mrs. Beady: Who are you?
• Denzel Crocker: I'm Denzel Crocker. I have a employer who could make you very rich and all I need is that green looking one right there. So, you interested.
• Mrs. Beady: Hmmm, if you help me exposed this surperhero, you got yourself a deal!
• Denzel Crocker: Very well then.
• Pip: Holy steak and eggs.
• Lincoln: We need reinforcements!
• Tigger: Back to the barn!

(They head back to warn everyone)

• Pip: Guys!
• Winnie the Pooh: Hey, what's the matter guys?
• -You look like you need help.
• Pip: We do need help!
• Tigger: Mrs. Beady got Otis and Cosmo tied up.
• Lincoln: And she's being aided by the bank robber and some crazy teacher.
• Timmy Turner: Does this teacher look middle aged, has a hump, and might have an obession with fairies?
• -Yes?
• Timmy Turner: What?! Crocker is here!?!
• Piglet: What?!
• Rabbit: What?!
• Eeyore: Huh?!
• Timmy Turner: What?!
• CJ: What?
• Mia: What?!
• Loud Sisters: What!?!
• Scruffy: What?
• Olive Doyle: What?
• Phineas Flynn, Isabella, Burford, and Baljeet: What!?
• Candace Flynn: What?
• Fireside Girls: What?
• Katie Knight: What?!
• Sunset Shimmer: Wait, what!?
• Timmy Turner: If they unmasked them, not only everyone will know animals and walk and talk but I'll lose my fairies forever.
• Holly: We can't let that happen.
• Tigger: This wasn't suppose to be part of the plan.
• Bessie: I knew you and the dynamic dofus would mess things up.
• Pig: Ah poor, Otis and Cosmo. I wish we could help them.
• Abby: Maybe we can, Pig. Maybe... we... can.
• Pig: You're scaring me.
• Lynn: Yeah. More than Lucy usually.
• Lucy: Sigh. It's just how I move through the universe. You wouldn't understand.
• Timmy Turner: First we need costumes to cover our identities.
• Phineas Flynn: Perry, do you still have the projector that we use to be superheroes?
• Perry: (chatters)
• Phineas Flynn: Perfect.
• Cadence Flynn: Well, that covers that.
• Scruffy: So, now all we need is a plan.
• Lincoln: I'm already did. Guys, huddle up. 

(Everyone huddles up while Lincoln tells his plan) 

The Ending

(Later, Otis is being finished tied to chair while Mrs. Beady ready her camera)

• Otis: (struggles) Guys, as a deputized officers of the law we must warn you that you both will not get away...
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, hush. I know who you really are, you're one of those talking animals from next door.
• Cosmo: Quick Question. Why I'm in a Bird cage?
• Denzel Crocker: Because, when I found out about you're a FAIRLY-GOD-PARENT, I'll send you to Bowser at Castle Koopa and drain the magic from you!
• Robber: Ok, uh, this is getting a little weird for me.

(Mrs. Beady fix the door with her foot)

• Mrs. Beady: Because of you two, People laugh and call me crazy. Not anymore!
• Denzel Crocker: So, unmask them, you robber guy!
• Robber: Ooh, I ain't getting too close. What if they has super-melty vision or something?
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, for goodness' sake. (gives him the camera) Here, you tape us, I'll unmask them myself. Now Cowman and Super-Not Cosmo, let's see who you both really are.

(Suddenly, Abby comes through the door as a superhero)

• Abby: Back off, fiends. Oh, I love what you done with the place. Are those the original sconces?
• Mrs. Beady & Denzel Crocker: Who are you?
• Abby: I'm Cowgirl.

(Timmy, Wanda, Sunset Shimmer and Pooh and his friends drop in too)

• Timmy Turner: And I'm Cleft the Boy-Chin Wonder. And my Ace the Dog, the Chim-hold.
• Winnie the Pooh: We're 100 Acre Heroes.
• The Rest of Our Heroes: Yep.
• -But we didn't come alone.

(Suddenly, Pig, Peck, and Freddy comes in costume)

• Pig: And I'm Mr. Hamtastic.
• Freddy: Paranoid Man, reporting! Stop looking at me!
• Peck: And the Green Rooster. Together, we are... The Justice Brood.
• Freddy: Hey, Peck, I was supposed to say that.
• Peck: I waited, but you didn't jump in.
• Freddy: Can we make our entrance again?
• Pig: Uh, fellows I think I split my pants.
• Mrs. Beady: Oh, enough of this.
• Pig: And skunk. (sprays skunk smell in her face and faints)
• Timmy Turner: Nice work Pig.
• Lincoln: Let's takedown Denzel!
• Denzel Crocker: (split into clones)
• Timmy Turner: Time to give a taste of Butt whoop.
• Denzel Crockers: No, thanks. we're allergic to MSG
• Lincoln: Well then. It's time to call in...the whole deck! (throws some cards down)
• Denzel Crockers: You think that scare us?
• Lincoln: Wait for it.

(Lori comes in and drives a van through the window)

• Lori: All right, girls, let's shuffle up and deal with these nutjobs.
• Luan: Obviously, you're not playing with a full deck! (knocks one out)
• Luna: Time to jam! (blast music in one of clones ears)
• Lola: Time to gem! (blinds one of the clone)
• Denzel Crocker: AHHH, MY EYES!!!
• Lana: Nothing beats a royal flush! (opens up a hydrant)
• Lynn: [holding up a manhole cover and reflect the water.] "This water will suit you just fine. (blast water in the other clones face)

(Wanda turns into a bat and starts whacking the clone)

• Wanda: I'm sorry Timmy. Would you like a swing?
• Timmy Turner: No I'm good. Continue.
• Lincoln: (sees the real one leaving) The real Crocker's getting away!
• Crocker: (with Cosmo in the cage) You'll never catch me! (laughs)
• Leni: I got him. (catches the real Crocker in her sash)
• Denzel Crocker: Well, guess I spoke to soon
• Lucy: I really dig what you're wearing.
• Leni: It really makes your eyes pop!
• Lisa: It's time to contain this insane teacher. (places him in a container)
• Denzel Crocker: Well, it's not like I saw this coming.
• Cosmo: Thanks for freeing me guys.
• Lori: It was nothing.
• -Care to finish off with Crocker, Cosmo?
• Cosmo: I'm on it! (He heading tows to Crocker)
• Denzel Crocker: Uh-oh.

(Cosmo begin to beat up Crocker)

• Denzel Crocker: You made defeat me, heroes. And I'll have my revenge! But first I'm gonna pass out. [he is laying on the floor in pain] Hugh-ugh, mother.
• -Well, looks like he's out cold.
• -Hey, Static Girl, why don't you give him a wake up call.
• CJ: Gladly. (shocks Crocker)
• Freddy: To me, Green Rooster.
• Peck: "To me," What's that supposed to mean?
• Freddy: I was hoping you knew.
• Robber: I'm getting out of this nuthouse. (makes a run for it)
• Otis: Not on the Cowman's watch.
• Otis: Ratboy, Scruffy. cow-apult!
• Scruffy: Throw us!

(Cowman throws Ratboy and Scruffy at the robber pants)

• Pip and Scruffy: Ratabunga!

(The robber was screaming and ran into Cowman)

• Otis: It's milking time, filth bag! (punches the robber and gives him to the cop.) He's all yours, officer.
• Officer Fred: Thank goodness for you, Cowman. (drives off)

(The heroes came out of hiding)

• Abby: Let's fight more crime, Cowman. I've been practicing my battle cry! (moos loudly)
• Otis: Ok Good good good. Ok maybe we should go back to our lair. Justice Brood...
• Winnie the Pooh: 100 Acre Wood Team...
• Everyone: AWAY!!! (trips)

(Back at the barnyard)

• Abby: Being superheroes was awesome Otis.
• Scruffy: I guess being a superhero isn't that boring as we thought it would be.
• Lola: We should do this more often.
• Baljeet: Yeah we should.
• Jeremy Johnson: It was totally amazing.
• Katie: I always wonder what it would be like to be a super hero.
• Isabella: And we can earn those Super Hero patches in no time.
• Gretchen: I would be cool to fight crime again.
• Lana: Yeah Otis. Do you think we can do it again?
• Luna: Yeah, can we?
• Otis: Of course fellas; with great cow power comes great cow responsibility.
• Bessie: Great, more heroes in spandex.
• Pig: Hey, look up in the sky!
• Rabbit: Its a hero signal!
• Peck: Wow! There summoning Cowman. You're gonna go, Otis? Otis? 
• Sunset Shimmer: They're gone.
• Eeyore: If you ask me, which nobody is, but where's Tigger, Cosmo, and Lincoln?
• Lisa: I think I saw them going to the roof.
• Freddy: Hey, has anybody ever notice that Otis and Cowman are never together at the same time? 
• Bessie: You really are 31 flavors of dumb aren't you? 

(Otis and Pip rides off into the night)

• Otis: Cowman...
• Pip: And Ratboy, AWAY! Are we there yet?
• Otis: No.
• Pip: How much longer?
• Otis: Uh, not for much longer.
• Pip: How many miles?
• Otis: Why are you asking me these questions?
• Pip: How come my face isn't up there? 
• Otis: Cause you a sidekick.
• Pip: So, sidekick can't get signals? 
• Otis: Cowman ignoring powers, activate.

(Later on the roof) 

• Cosmo: Should we go with them?
• Lincoln: Nah, we'll let them handle this one. I don't think they need us for a while!
• Tigger: True Lincoln-boy, but then again. You never know when there be a call for...
• Cosmo: Super-Not Cosmo!
• Lincoln: Ace Savy!
• Tigger: And...The Mask Offender!

(A book closes)

• Pip: (squeaks)

THE END!